by James Alexander-Sinclair
Like Richard I too own a cat of which I am quite fond - she is what my daughter calls "middle sized" in other words tending towards the tubby. She is very good at sleeping and dismembering mice on my office floor.
Like Richard I too own a cat of which I am quite fond - she is what my daughter calls "middle sized" in other words tending towards the tubby. She is very good at sleeping and dismembering mice on my office floor.
In spite of all this feline bonhomie I am more often asked how to keep cats off gardens. The scenario is this: Neighbouring cats slouch through fence and leave interesting surprises just below soil level. The innocent gardener comes into close contact with said deposit and swears loudly. Cats regard gardener with a supercilious look as if they were Duchesses and you, the de facto owner of the garden, just the lowliest drip on the nose of a tramp.
So how to deal with it? Everybody seems to have a theory. Some say filled bottles of water lying around the place (not the most attractive option but very popular in Japan.)
Some swear by spikes that stick to the wall and are the cat equivalent of walking barefoot over sharp gravel.
Others claim that Lion Dung does the trick - which is all very well but if one owned a lion then I think that domestic cats would perhaps no longer be a problem. Lion dung is also extremely stinky. You could plant Coleus canina which occasionally works. The most extreme method that I have heard of (and one, I hasten to add, that I am not actively recommending) is an electric fence smeared with cat food.
My three favoured solutions are as follows:
1. Investing in a very high powered water pistol: this is both effective and satisfying provided that you happen to be in the right place at the right time with a loaded weapon.It does have the tacit approval of the church of England, as you can see here.
2. This was told to me by the legendary Reg Moule of BBC Radio Hereford and Worcester and is called the Cat Mine. Dig a hole in a newly prepared and tempting looking piece of ground. Into that hole place an inflated balloon which you then cover with a loose covering of soil. The offending cat comes along and performs and then begins the burying process. The claws of the cat then pierce the balloon which goes off with an almighty bang which scares the living daylights out of the offending feline.
3. Buy a dog.
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