Grasses are wind pollinated so don't do anything to provide nectar for insects so do indeed use the black grass which is actually a form of lily and has blue flowers in late spring/early summer.
Bronze forms of carex buchananii are evergreen and clump forming and will neither get too high nor invade. They look extremely good with verbena bonariensis which does grow tall but is light and airy and also has nectar and pollen for insects.
You could also consider forms of stipa such as tenuensis or even gigantica as this forms a fairly low mound of grassy foliage with tall, elegant stems of oat like flower and seed heads.