I did look on the internet and they say to pinch out the dead but this didnt help the whole plant stem came out thats not good is it :/
When you say that, I assume you mean that the whole stem came away when you tried to pull of the dead buds?
Regardless, perhaps the problem is the damp weather we've been having? Perhpas they are not happy sitting in a damp soil and the stems are dying as a result?
Just a guess...