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Dovefromabove wrote (see)

I rather like Margo - I know OH does 


So do I Dove - but I can just hear her saying 'Gerry...' in that piercing cut glass voice !! Brilliant. 

Your OH - too much info... 


As suggested, you need a lot of different noises such as wind chimes - although they drive me mad too - and running water or your own music if you can point some speakers at your garden when you want to sit out.  

I suggest you also offer a big bag of gobstoppers or get some ear plugs............


Pottie Pam

My daughter has noisy neighbours and she is considering getting geese as they are very noisy. I just hope she doesn't regret it.


Yesterday, I found the solution to the yapping dogs and chickens.  No noisy neighbours, thank goodness.  Did have one, but she moved.  Never spoke in a normal voice, just shouted.

Back to yesterday, spotted one yappy dog owner, washing his car,  sporting a pair of headphones.  Thought, that's it.  I must get myself whatever it is you have these days, get some music on it and then I won't hear the chickens and the dogs. I do, of course, intend to sing along at the top of my voice.

That could be your answer too Rodgy.


WOW what a responce. I know this is a hard one to deal with thats why I asked for advise here's pics of my patio...

Pic no 1 this is the dividing fence

 this shows my patio area and if you look at the end of the garage we have had to move our patio table to this area. But why should I have to be forced up the garden when just outside on my patio its like a sun trap and because of all the brick work its rather warm here even on a dull day.


 I tried to get a view over the fence to show the scale of their patio area it stretches across the garden about 60' from our fence to the neighbours the otherway!

I think we will be going with the water feature idea we've been to a local water garden specialist today, they were so sympathetic and put all their featurs on for me so I could hear the different sounds and sound levels of the falls. Looks like I'll have to rejig my plants...move my box as I think we're going for a waterblade feature like this...





probably not on such a huge scale. I do like the cedar modern fencing on a vertical, we'll be creating this on a very small budget!

DFAb, Margo would be too sophisticated a name for her this she's not! I do however have a nickname for her, 'Cruela Deville' My neighbours the other way to me knows her by no other name lol...she's so lovely when you first meet her, but she's poison if you get on the wrong side of her. On the defensive all the time, if you have any complaints you get a round of very colourful language. Its no wonder her son doesn't have any respect for anyone because he's had a great master!

I thought of putting speakers in the garden but she'll just wop hers up she likes that loud too...two weekends ago she had her doors & windows wide open blasting the music, I got fed up so went and opened all mine blasted my music until she turned hers down, then as quick as she turned it down I turned mine off. I think she got the message, just a shame she's so brash! we went to view another house yesterday and I was sad, I really don't want to move I've lived here 23 years, and why should she force me out! I do on the other hand feel I'm at the end of my tether  I think I'll try the lawn mower trick if she's out there when I am and I get sick of her voice, the sprinkler might be a good one too as she could do with a nasel wash to clear her sinus (she talks through her nose)!

I keep coming back to edit as there are so many replies..

I've known her husband for as long as we've lived here, We got on with him great he was once considerate, however he's changed over the last few years. His first wife was lovely really, my sort of gal, I still keep in touch with her via FB. they got divorced he remortgaged then within a week of his wife moving out he moved this big bird in and her obnoxious son! I think he needed someone to iron his shirts! she saw him as a meal ticket for her and her son - this I'm certain even his own son pleaded with him not to marry her! out of the frying pan into the fire.


Rodgy your garden and patio look lovely, don't be driven away. Try the water feature and maybe your OH could take her into their confidence and mention that you are having trouble with your nerves and need some peace and quiet at the minute, so apols' in advance cos you are very irrational just now, might kill oops over the top there....  but a few lies won't hurt.

Maybe by then she might have got used to lowering her voice. On the down side everyone else will avoid you cos' no doubt she'll tell everyone.


Hi TT I have succumbed to wearing earplugs at times, I've even worn my MP3 player whilst gardening, but when you have friends and family round its a bit difficult!


Hi Kef, I've decided she's not pushing me out! we just need to come up with an answer to the problem. both the she devil and her husband are unapproachable, My hubby feels the same as I do and we're both just so fed up. We've agreed we'll be giving it a year see if it all dies down after all the builder have gone. If I / we still feel the same in a years time then we'll put a sign up in the front and move some where rural. I think you may have discussed my mental health already with Mr R-d ha ha ha.


..I both sympathise and empathise.... I left my lovely garden on the south coast - 15 years in the making - because of bad neighbours... young couple moved in, very noisy, redid the kitchen about 3 times in as many years..drilling, banging, music... taking our parking spaces as and when they pleased... I couldn't stand it any longer, made my nerves so bad, we had to move out... I had a lovely garden there and still view it on google maps sometimes... as the image is the same as when I moved out...

people often move on themselves though, and you never know, they just might go too, perhaps in a couple of years or so... people get itchy feet... hope that happens for you in this case...

in meantime, I might plant some evergreens -  dense growth would help block out the noise somewhat... pittosporum, arbutus... ceanothus concha.... things like that...


Which way does the prevailing wind blow?  What about a smokey BBQ or Chiminea 


Thank you Salino, thats so sad, its no wonder that our society is breaking down. People just don't have the respect for others like they used to. Its every man for himself with most people and b****r everyone else! I can't see them ever moving on they have just spent way over the odds having their house extended all because she couldn't stand the thought of me having a bigger kitchen. Oh no she had to go bigger at the back and wider and taller. I know it may come across sour grapes, but honestly it isn't. We only ever wanted to extend the small 11' x 6' kitchen we had. Both our sons have left home leaving only us two but our kitchen has only ever been tiny and thought when the family came round it would be nice to have that kitchen diner area to socialise. our extension will maybe have cost us £18,000 approx we project managed it ourselves, they on the other hand have had a builder build them a double story extension to the side as well as a huge kitchen diner on the back. If the Quote they gave us for the front garden wall is anything to go by they must have spent around £100,000 on their house. They will never be able to command that back on their value as a semi in these parts will only command what the going rate is for the area. they will be in negitive equity otherwise. This is a fact we got from the local estate agents when we were in the planning stages of our extension. So I think we're stuck with them!


 Dovefromabove wrote (see)

Which way does the prevailing wind blow?  What about a smokey BBQ or Chiminea 


west normally! my sister suggested that, but anything I buy she has to go out and get a better one! here's a great example: I bought some twinkly solar lights for a few of my bushes, next minute I look guess who has them in hers? so when she was nosing against the fence I randomly ssaid to my husband "oh I'm having those lights off them bushes they look cheap, can I have some of those designer posts?" would you believe it she had the electrician in last week putting in garden post lights!


Rodgy soz to bang on I'll leave it after this. But in my last job I often found the most unapproachable seeming people, were suddenly changed if they thought they had a bit of info', or could tell everyone they were doing someone a big favour. Very hard I know but just smile an odd time, you never know. Sometimes gobby people make a noise so you can here, because they are fed up and lonely and want an audience, and for obvious reasons people don't talk to them.

I currently have good neighbours but when we moved in one did get on my nerves until my hubby ( more sociable than me) talked to him, now we chat about once a week and I can cope with that. He's an ok man, not my cup of tea, but thankfully no weeds coming over.

Will leave you in peace Love the water feature on pic'  would like it regardless.


Kef I know exactly what your saying...Its seems when I write that I have excuses for all suggestions. I did throw an olive branch about a month ago. It was 2.30 in the morning and there was an awful disturbance next door. She was screaming like a banshee at her Son and Husband. The worse I've ever heard them. The next morning her builder came knocking at my door, he said that he'd heard we'd had a disturbing night of which I replied 'yes' then he asked me if I'd go and see if she was alright...I was the last person she wanted to see that morning, but knowing it had been a bad fight i sighed, gritted my teeth and the next minute stood at her front door. Her face was a picture of dread, like i said I was the last person she needed to see. I found myself asking her if she would like to come in for a coffee. Now I vowed that hell would freeze over before she would ever set a foot in my door! now she's sat pouring her heart out for two hours. I thought we'd sorted our differences, I was so wrong, I've even passed pleasentries over the fence! but if she clocks me first she puts her head down and makes a sharp exit. I'm now under the impression she jumped at the chance (even under the circumstances) of coming into my house because she wanted to see if hers was better than mine! I was being sincere and genuinely felt sorry for her. Now I feel like I was a fool.

My hubby summed her up its like she's raising her elbows and trying to push us out the way with her brashness. She once told me she was bullied, I do believe she has turned into one herself.


flowering rose

that is awful,I had some very noisy neighbours ,you know the type late night parties and voices that echo around neighbourhood.Now this is a bit naughty but one night (I could take no more)I poured some of my stinking manure liquid on the garden near the fence adjoining offending noise,boy it stank well and truly and the party ended.still you can t do that all the time,such a waste!??

Things could be so much worse 'rodgy dodge'.  I have the neighbours from HELL!  When I moved in here alone, almost ten years ago, next door had a karaoke machine, which they sang on late at night - full blast.  Also, while she has a mouth like a fog-horn, he is a total fantasist & boasts & brags about being a company director, (in reality he's a salesman) and is the joke of the whole street.  Frequent parties occurred with their mates shouting, banging doors, etc.  The dog was left alone in the house all day, barking & howling.  Initially, I tried being diplomatic & tactful, then I got angry with them because they showed NO consideration whatsoever.  Finally we got to the point where we were hurling insults & abuse over the fence. Refusing to be a helpless woman, I gave them a bit of their own medicine by making noise - and was threatened by Mr Big Shot!!  (Not sure if I spelled that right).  Anyway, I kept a diary for a while & then went to the police and the local council.  The police involvement was brilliant!  And the outcome is that things are much quieter now - In fact they are up for sale!!  Hallelujah!!  Now, I don't recommend you do the same & retaliate like I did, because it has been a horrible experience.   But what I do say is, it could be so much worse!  So, don't move!!  You have a lovely garden.  Just pray that if & when MY neighbours do move, it's not near to you!!  Good luck!


Aw thanks for sharing your experience nikki, I supose I should be thankful that they are not noisy all the time. My sister had an experience similar to your own. This week her neighbours got evicted! her troubles have been going on for over 2 years with death threats against them. So yes I thank my lucky stars I haven't got it as bad as some. all I want is to drown out her horrible voice when she decides to sit right next to us on her extended patio. I'm busy pricing up the componants for one of these water blade waterfalls. which will  look good in my garden and hopefully affect her bladder!

hmmm fr liquid comfrey sounds just the ticket I might just water my plants with it next time I'm out there  although I do sit in that area too

I can sympathise with you totally. Our neighbour is a nightmare when it comes to noise. He spent over two years doing his house up and had no consideration for disrupting our lives at very unsociable times, then had the audacity to say they didn't make any noise.

He constantly shouts instead of talking and raises the volume when he knows we are relaxing in the garden. Obnoxious is too tame a word to describe him. We call him foghorn leghorn.

I have read the posts on your thread and a lot of ideas have got me thinking, particularly the water feature.

He's just built a conservatory that overlooks into our kitchen, or it would have done if I hadn't acted first after his big gob told the street what his intentions were. I have bonsai shelves next to the fence and have put up conifers in pots on the top shelf, which more or less hides the windows on his conservatory. I will have to wait until they return from holiday to see if they drowned his dulcet tones out a bit.

It is a difficult situation and I sympathise totally. It's so tempting to retalliate and play them at their own game. I lost it a bit the other day and did shout and moan a bit at him. Okay it worked (and probably shocked him), but I felt bad that I resorted to this as its not in my nature to do so.

I hope you get something sorted so you can enjoy your lovely garden.


Oh Heck what awful situations you guys have been in.  I'm dreading my new neighbour.  The previous one was lovely and not often noisy, but its been sold to a single guy....  Hope this can be resolved with them having a change of heart, but its likely to be the slightly less than subtle tactics.  Noisy wind chimes, barbecue - make it a smelly/smoky one.. Plenty of manure on your garden, but that makes it smelly for you too.  Have to tried putting their house on the market?  Ring and estate agent for them... maybe not.  the Water feature is a great idea with the one you have pictured looks lovely.  Have you tried joinging in their conversation when they start talking? Is she friendly with any of your neighbours, for you to try to get them on your side.  Its a huge problem for lots as it's the considerate and caring people like yourselves that are the ones to suffer not them.  Good luck and hope you get peace and quiet and soon.