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sorry...prob very obvious...but what do I do when the black box with "message" and "ignore" appears?
If you don't want to do either, just slide off it and it will go away. I find it annoying that it pops up so readily, I think it would be much better if you had to hover for a second or two to make it appear.
That normally comes up when you put the mouse over the picture of the poster. Just ignore it (take your mouse off it) unless you want to send them a message.