A man opens his door and finds a snail on his front porch.
He picks it up and throws it across the street.
A year later the man opens his door and finds the same snail on his front porch.
The snail looks up and says, "What the f..k was *that* all about?"
I man walks into a bar ,ouch that hurt he said.
Clueless, are they ALWAYS ON THE STARBOARD BOW?
Ok, Diddy. Isn't the saying something like 'Be careful what you ask for?! I think I learned the meaning of that just now! Should have left your jokes to other threads! Only joking. I 'GOT' and laughed at,nearly all of them ! And thanks for taking the hints to come here.
A man meets a genie, as you do, who grants him one wish. " I want to live forever" he says. " I can't grant those sort of wishes " the genie said, " ok, I want to live until England win the world cup again then" you crafty git " said the genie.
Hey! Just thought of this
Whats the the most miserable dessert?
Apple Grumble. Good eh?
Hey Verdun .....that was a cracking joke.
Thanks dove. You're not just humouring me now are you? (do like these smilies now I can use them)
That was an excellent joke Verdun. Not dirty, not too long
Well, since I know you lot aren't humouring me I have a lot more of those jokes you all like.......
Well, what are you waiting for? Out with them!
where do cats keep their money...
in their purr...se da tah!
A purrfect joke I think gardeningfantic.....
It's so annoying. I want to water my lawn but it's raining