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09/10/2013 at 18:11

What do flowers drink  to keep healthy?   Acteamel?   Actea/actimel? 

(don't get this quality anywhere else )

09/10/2013 at 18:20

FG. Trust you to lower the tone. Go stand in the corner.

09/10/2013 at 19:05

Peter's is worse..

Actually - the Dahlia Mail would be a better paper anyway...

Verdun...thank goodness we don't......one of your worst! 

09/10/2013 at 19:32

Hey!  Wot  you hinting at  Fairygirl?   you dispara...dissparragin...di.....rubbishing my jokes?  

Im sure the more discerning members will disagree with you   

Ok, what veg are happy to wait their turn?  Cucumbers, of course!  Queue cumbers???   There you go, spontaneous wit 

and finally, but not necessarily the last. Wot  plants are related to animals?  Catkins...cat kin?  See, first class off the cuff.  Now that is a good one 

......I'll get my coat 

09/10/2013 at 20:00

Verd....I don't know what to say....

you took the words out my mouth...coat and hat please..

09/10/2013 at 20:12

I thought Verdun's jokes were quite good.  I can't even think of any.

09/10/2013 at 20:23

Why thank you busy.  You're so much nicer than Fairygirl 

Clearly, you have a fine sense of a good joke.  Huge respect for that 

13/10/2013 at 21:02

I love jokes .... but I can never remember any to telll on here 

13/10/2013 at 21:07

Brum...... you panicked me then.  

27/10/2013 at 09:34

this is not a joke but a qoute from Mae West

Sex is like bridge; if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

 

Made me smile

James

27/10/2013 at 09:35

Oooh really CG

27/10/2013 at 09:51

sorry it must be the extra hour 

I'm waitting for the shops to open rost chicken to buy and clubcard points to be added then I'm off into the garden to make some room for a compost bin for leaves

 

James

27/10/2013 at 12:07

James...tut tut...

You'd best hurry with your bin or the wind'll blow the whole lot into another county!

27/10/2013 at 12:40

I'm a meat ignorant veggie.  I thought roast chicken came out of the oven, not the supermarket

27/10/2013 at 14:24

ha ha nutcutlet you can buy fresh roasted (spit) chicken nice when your feeling lazy

29/10/2013 at 15:39

Hi Brumbull

I'm sorry to hear about your daffodil poisoning incident (page 13 of this thread as I see it, 13/10/2013).

The same thing happened to my brother a little earlier (page 8 of the thread, 21/08/2013).

Most unfortunate.

30/10/2013 at 14:47

I have enjoyed this thread a lot. Thanks everyone

08/11/2013 at 18:55

Why does Santa have 3 gardens?   

So he can say ho ho ho.    ...........ok ok ok.  Off the cuff y'know 

Why does father Christmas crack jokes?   So he can slay..sleigh ..you with them .........just told someone this joke and the expression was not good. Must be good though cos I'm still laughing.  Its the way I tell em......    

I'll get my coat, shall I?..............

 

08/11/2013 at 19:13

http://s4.gardenersworld.com/uploads/images/original/33816.jpg?width=284&height=350&mode=max

 

08/11/2013 at 19:26

Sue, sue sue!   Dear me!  

Like it.....like it a lot 

(you didn't comment on my rather clever jokes though?  I have a feeling you were overwhelmed by their superbness and rightly so)