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Just stylsh Philippa 


Like myself tetley. Borderline genius in fact

I think I'm cleva too 

Steve 309

Two Irish jokes which don't depend on their supposed lack of intelligence:

Mick goes for a job on a building site (I didn't say there was no stereotyping, did I?) and the foreman says, "OK, Mick, but first I have to give you a test to make sure you know enough about the job."

"Fire away", he replies.

"Right, Mick:  What's the difference between a joist and a girder?"


"Oh, that's easy", replies our friend, "Joist wrote Ulysses and Girder wrote Faust".


Why are the Irish the richest people in the world?


What do you call a patronising criminal walking down stairs?

A condescending condescending 



What is small, red and whispers?














a hoarse radish!


One night Tom the nightwatchman dreampt the plane his boss was due to catch crashed and everyone was killed.

worried about this Tom informed him his boss who decided not to take that flight.  As Tom said the plane crashed with no survivors.

grateful for this warning Tom received a thank you of £100 and the sack.  

Why was Tom sacked?


Cos he was dreaming and therefore asleep while he was supposed to be working!

The clue's in his job-title

Snow, well it worked in primary achool there 

you got sunshine there?  Warm there? dry there?  Ha ha 

Yes.....yes I was.  


Hi Snow.

Sorry we have not met before, but.....

Snow wrote (see)
Someone keeps dumping soil all over my allotment.
I don't know who's doing it; the plot thickens.

You are now one of the club.

Which reminds me…….

Whilst posted overseas, in the Middle East, sometime ago, I woke one morning feeling really under the weather and rather down, so I threw my gardener in a bucket of bleach.

That really lightened Mahmood.

Steve 309

... because their capital is always Dublin.


(You may need to turn back a page)

Hey! Sheer spontaneous brilliance........

What parliamentary officials represent birds?

Polyticians !

Good eh! Clever aint I?



Who's a clever boy then?

WHO ON EARTH MISREPRESENTED ME BACK THERE? Such an unfunny joke not deserving of Verdun's (immense) talent

Which side of a parrot has the prettiest feathers?










The outside




I went to the shops today to buy a new whisk to make pancakes. Really annoyed - I came home to discover I already had two of them.

It's my own fault. I should have done a 'whisk' assessment....

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