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MOB rants

a place to lt off steam about all the irritating and/or stupid ideas you have come across lately

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That's why I gave up driving.

Blackest, what payment was that then we never got half of anything.
We were mobile workshops who followed the tanks literally, if they broke down (often) or got stuck throwing a track (often) I had four Forward repair teams with Half tracks cranes mounted on them trailers full of spares and normally an engine, we changed them in situ plus me running round in my land rover checking things out. The initials for those units was Forward Armoured Repair teams, work it out for yourself.
With all the teams out one day we got a call one was on its side just down the forest track from us, grabbing a couple of fitters I fired up the D8 and went looking. We lashed cables to the tank and the D8 and I started up, two minutes later the D8 was sitting on its bottom plate, no ground under the tracks and the tank still having rather a lean time. That took some living down, we fastened chains to the D8 and the nearest big tree then used the winch on the D8 which would have been the best idea in the first place, then I winched myself out. The lads lived on the story of the WO1 being bellied in the D8 for quite a while. I did get my own back but that is another story.


GF - just got back from Cornwall, and have only just seen your post from yesterday regarding your parking problems. That would be me too! Sense and normal neighbourly standards say that's not the way to behave, but it's the only way to sort out some problems, and, be honest, after the initial guilt feelings, don't you feel much better?

Completely different rant today.  Why don't blokes dispose of the evidence??

If I was going to snaffle an entire packet of biscuits (and that's not unknown), wouldn't you put the evidence (empty packet) in the bin, hoping that they'd be forgotten and you'd be let off the hook?  or even putting the empty packet (chocolate that was MINE in this case) back in the fridge? That's just rubbing it in, oh, Darling, I've scoffed all your chocolate, despite the fact that for one week every month you turn into a screaming harpy that only chocolate can appease, but I'm going to leave the empty packet in the fridge to taunt you, cos I can't be bothered to turn 180 degrees, lift the lid to the bin and dispose of the evidence.

If he starts on the jelly beans, I'll be up in front of the beak.........

Gardening Grandma

That is truly mean, MMP!!! I would never do a thing like that. OH does lay into the biscuits when I've gone to bed (his body clock works entirely differently from mine) but I hide the good stuff for my own secret feasts. Have you run out of good hiding places? Perhaps we should have a competition - suggest the best hiding place for secret feast fuel.


Emergency pack of jelly beans in sock draw.  Emergency pack of Galaxy counters in frozen peas bag.

We have a small fridge in the bedroom, from when LO was on the bottle at 2am.  That has some cans of Fizzy Mango juice, emergency grown up ginger beer, another emergency bag of counters, and some creme eggs that were an add-on from ordering my gloves from Amazon.  I don't think he knows about them.  Actually, I know he doesn't know about them, as they are still there.....actually, the box is still there.........

I love the fact that you're as worried that he thieves your choc, MMP, but are utterly livid he didn't throw the empties!!
Surely some form of penance is in order? Along with secret hiding places for the good stuff as per GG's suggestion
Mmmmm. Now, where's that box of chocs
*disapears off to raid the cupboards*

Mummy.. it is a nightmre.. they dont understand that 1 week out of every 4 we NEED choc!!!.. dunno why but it is the only time i need it and i dont have them anymore! but its still there. and it is the only time i buy chocolate and we have it in the house.. so weird..

but my O/H has learnt not to touch it.. ever!!!! some years ago when i flipped my lid and threw all his fishing maggots out of the garge fridge for the birds.. never done it since. ha ha

and to you who came back from cornwall.. cant remember who.. and cant find way to go back when i am writing in the box to check on who said what, is there a way.. if so please tell me.. yes i did feel good about it.. after the guilt had worn off.. which didn't take long 

rant today is about the blerdy extendable dog leads.. wish owners would real them in when a cyclist goes past.,. one took out my little lad last night.. didnt i ahve a go at them.. he rang his bell several times coming up behind them from some distance as i tell him to.. to give people time to move etc... they turned and were aware of us.. so no excuse.. but did nothing about it.. and i couldnt get him to stop in time.. as yelling at him.. STOP! now. but ya know how they are. dont listen to ya.

OK chaps, today's rant is about TGB's - thieving Gypsy Personages.  OH took the battery out of his very old vauxhall Cavalier, and has had it charging for the last couple of days.  Today, thought someone was delivering a parcel, opened the door only to find a flatbed truck speeding off, and battery missing.

Rang 101 (police non-emergency number), they were really non-commital until I mentioned I had some lovely pictures of said personage on my CCTV (not the first time it's happened).  I think the battery was goosed anyway, but the fact that they've walked up my drive, taken the crocodile clips off (the charger is inside, luckily enough), and had it away on their thieving little toes with MY battery.

Plod's been round, and as I don't know how to record from the CCTV recorder, they've taken some photos off it they will circulate, and let me know if anything comes of it.  Annoyed and a little worried, as I thought it was a delivery so opened the door, only to see a flatbed speeding down the road.  If  my LO hadn't been mucking about with his shoes, I'd have been face-to-face with him.  The Policewoman said that if I'd been a bloke, I would probably have been thumped, but lots of time faced with a fiesty woman they'll put it down and run away, apparently us ladies fight dirty and aren't above targeting the conkers!  All the time, not a peep out of the dog!  However, had I come face to face with him, I think Max would have shown them some teeth, he's a clever boy for a dog, and knows the difference between the postman and the scrapman (postman= biscuits and fuss, scrapman = shouting and growliness).

So I am not a happy bunny, I hope they fit the battery to their scabby truck, and it gives out when they've just pinched something from a farmer with a handy shotgun, and they spend tomorrow having shot picked out of their bottoms.

I have a friend who works in A&E, and they normally 'run out' of anaesthetic for anyone who's been unfortunate enough to have been bitten by police dogs!

GF, I had similar problems with ramblers on the towpath when I used to cycle, they'd look behind, and we'd all be yelling 'Excuse me!!!', so they'd spread out so we had to stop.  One day I had enough, went to the local bike shop, and asked did he have anything that was very LOUD.  Answer was a battery powered horn.  Next time, cycled up, yelled as normal, they spread out as normal, then I honked the horn.  I think one of them S**t themselves, one jumped out of her skin and very nearly ended up in the canal, but boy did they shift!  Maybe buy your Son one of these, the dog really won't like it, as boy, it is loud.  It was also useful in getting rid of yappy-type dogs that would attach themselves to the toe of your boot by their teeth (not good, you lose your balance with one of those things, as soon as your foot goes on the floor the little darlings can reach your ankles).  One honk of that thing, and they were off, yelping for their mummies! 


mummy.. LOL.. not at your theft form your property.. but the horn.. it is terrible that your things can be taken and yet the police dont really care.. they go through the motions and that is it really.. lik ewhen we had a brick through the office window.. missed my daughter then 7 my inches.. and the came round took brick away for finger printing..ha ha.. hopefully you are right on their demise when trying to use it. duno what this country is coming too.. got worse over last 5 years.

i will get him a horn.. thought about air horn you can get also.  they are so rude.. it is a cycle path and the signs say that walkers must make way for cyclists.. and respect each other on the track.. do they ever.. the dog owners where i lice think the rule the roost.. the parks the pathways.. the roads everywhere.. and they think they dont have to pick up after their dogs also.. lovely coastal path splatterd with mess.. disgusting.


also.. my daughter was attacked my one of those little barking dogs.. she was practising her cycling with hand signals round the park..  outside our house..and it came at her.. the owners didnt say anything.. didnt even bring her home..when i caught up with them they just said well he doesnt like bikes or children.. so i said shouldnt be off the lead in the park where chiildren are playing on their bikes and scooters and football etc..then should he.. and that they should havve had control of their dog instead of being up the other end of park at the time. took their detials and informed them i would contacting the police as it had bitten her leg..

witnesses (other dog oweners) said they saw her kicking at it and it was her fault.. informed them that she was trying to get off her leg.. and that it had bitten right through to the skin and torn her trousers also.. they didnt care.. typical

worse thing is she had been afraid of dogs for some time and she was just getting used to not crossing over everytime one was coming towards her..and this put her right back.

the police did contact the owners and managed to make them pay for replacement trousers etc.. and fined them for lack of control of their dog.. WOW!!! didnt help my daughter thou really did it.

The potty gardener

My moan seems very trivial- The notifications of posts have stopped again!!!


Small yappy type dogs are the worst!  I have big dogs (well, sadly down to one since I lost my lovely big girl last year), and they as soft as butter.  A few years ago we were on a preserved railway somewhere (down south somewhere I think), before we had the kids, and a chap got on, and took one look at the dogs, and was about to get off again - I persuaded him to stay on, as he had been afraid of German Shepherd dogs all his life, since being attacked by one as a child.  I told him Bracken's story, and he felt sorry for her (she'd been beaten and was afraid of leather belts), and plucked up the courage to stroke her.  It ended up with Bracken leaning against him, giving him the odd encouraging lick, and him feeding her the odd gravy bone.  I think we converted  him, I think I lectured him a bit on how to 'read' a GSD - things to look at are the ears and tail, if they're up and it's barking, it's a confident dog and most likely NOT to bite.  If ears and tail are down and it's barking, it's doing it to try to frighten you so you'll go away, and is more likely to bite out of fear.

I must smell 'right' to GSD's, as I've had security patrol dogs and police dogs on their backs for me to rub their tummies, and it's surprised some of the handlers.  One in particular, I put my hand out for him to sniff, after a quick once-over, he used it as a springboard to put one paw on each shoulder and tried to give me a good snogging!!  This was a dog that only two handlers would take out, as it had a reputation for being nasty!

People forget that a dog's DNA is very similar to a Wolf's DNA, and they need a strong pack leader (you) if they're going to be happy and behave themselves.  Lots of dogs that aren't used to children will bite, as kids tend to move very quickly and don't always behave themselves.  There is no excuse for a dog to attack a child, though, and I believe that rather than a fine, the owners should be made to pay for, and attend, without fail, a dog training/behaviour course.

There are very few truly bad dogs (they do exist, my Mum had a Skye Terrier that was very bad, went for me at age 4, it went to the RSPCA, as my Mum told them 'Do I have to wait for it to get in the pram and savage my baby before you collect it?  Or shall I just go to the press now?'), most dogs are OK but boundaries aren't set by the owners.  So very few bad dogs, unfortunately lots of poor owners.

I hope your daughter gets over her fears, are there any parents at school that have a well behaved dog that your daughter can visit, so she realises they aren't all bad?  I would hate for her to grow up like the chap on the train, to realise later on in life that dogs are, by and large, much better than blokes!!

Gardening Grandma

MMP, once again, I love your spirit!  

I have two small dogs, both of whom are very soppy and friendly, but one loves chasing bikes and the other is bad-tempered when he feels threatened. He does not bite but no one would be likely to believe it when he shows his teeth. It means that we dare not let them off the lead unless we are a long way off the road. We don't use extendable leads because of the dangers mentioned in earlier posts and we are pretty responsible about picking up poo, etc. What we can't control, though, is the occasional unpredictable moment when the escape artiste gets away (the bike chaser) as we put her in the car or the nervous one (the growler) gets spooked by someone's loud voice or fast approach. Little dogs just are yappy at times. However, if one bit, I'm afraid he would be down the vet's for the lethal shot, though I'd be heartbroken. There is no excuse for a dog bite, unless violent aggression was used against the dog first. No matter how much one loves a dog, we have to live in society and behave decently towards humans first.


Karma has been in action today.  Yesterday I had a TGB steal a car battery from my front step (Rozzers been around and taken stills from the CCTV, lovely clear pictures of the bloke walking off with MY battery).  Today I had a bloke in a much nicer van deliver my a lovely new TV that I've won in an internet competition.  So to everyone who thinks they're a scam, someone does win them, and very, very occaisonally it's me.

So I think that's a fair exchange, a goosed battery for a brand new telly.  Still hope they get a bum full of shot just to even things up a little bit more.

Gardening Grandma

On the theme of theft, I received an email the other day purporting to be from Paypal. It said that a payment of £39 had been made to Skype. There was a link to click on if I wanted to dispute that I had authorised thhis payment. I clicked on the link, but something told me not to try to log in to Paypal. Instead I found Paypal through a search engine and signed in to query this. They replied that no such payment had been made and this was a phishing email. I was to change my Paypal password immediately and run a virus scan on my computer.

Just posting this as a warning to others.


I must be the luckiest person alive, i have won millions in lottery prizes every week pretty much for years and I don't even bother buying a ticket anymore.  These days i don't bother claiming as it is such a pain having to rearrange the furniture to make way for yet another lottery win.

I did try forwarding the claim forms to Enda kenny so he could pay of the national debt rather than introduce further pay cuts and increased taxation. but he said something about an institution but haven't we given those bankers enough.

Gardening Grandma

I NEVER win the lottery. But then, I never buy a ticket.