Log on to the mail preference service (that's similar to the telephone preference service), that will remove all UNADDRESSED mail to your property.
If it has your name and address on it, they still have to deliver it, but it should get rid of the majority of recycling that comes through your door.
Frank, I would write to them (virgin media) and request that your details are removed permanently from their mailing lists. I don't know if there is an ombudsman for mail, or even an organisation that's similar. I know when I worked doing the reporting for the call centre, there was an organisation (I forget what it was called) that would fine us thousands of pounds if we persistently called someone on the TPS, or if someone complained they were gettting 'silent calls'. These are the calls where you answer the phone and no-one is on the other end. This is down to a piece of software that monitors calls and when it thinks there will be someone free to try and sell you double-glazing/solar panels/PPI mis-selling/other unwanted and unrequested tat, it calls the next number on it's dialling list. With a computer involved, it often gets it wrong and rings you when no-one is available (I'm sure most folk have experienced this). Trouble is, it sometimes persistently calls someone with no-one on the other end, and this can be really quite frightening if you live on your own, are elderly or of a nervous dispostion. So the organisation that looks after call centres comes down on you like a ton of bricks if that happens, you get a mega fine and the person's number is placed on a 'blacklist'. The blacklist is a very important list in a call centre, as you will pay for a list of numbers from somewhere. Don't know where, they are not popular with anyone but call centre owners. The blacklist is then run against the list of numbers, and any blacklist numbers are removed. Decent call centres (ones UK based that abide by the code of conduct) also run the TPS list against the call list (Telephone preference service). That's how you get removed from call lists. Register with the TPS and after two months contact them and tell them you are getting lots of calls with no-one on the other end. Most of the time they just blacklist you, sometimes if you're really upset about it they will investigate and find out who the culprit is, and wallop you with a fine and tell you to update your TPS list more often.
Sorry I can't help with the post issue, other than recommending MPS, there must be something similar there - you might like to contact them Frank, I'm sure there is something they can do to ensure your wife's name is removed from all mailing lists, as I'm sure this really hurts when you get something addressed to her after all this time. If there is something similar for the post, they can find out who is selling her details, whack them with a fine and tell them to pull their socks up and remove her name from the list. We still get post over the road for my Father-in-Law, and he's been gone for over 10 years. Some companies have no shame.