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Yes, definitely keep a diary of events. It is incredibly wearisome and emotionally draining but can prove to be very useful in the end.
I started doing that with the dog chorus but found I was spending so much time with pen and paper and getting quite neurotic! Trouble is, with cutbacks, the council aren't interested in dog barking and tell you to approach the owner. A lot of good that will do. One owner denied her dog barked!!
Zoomer that's a hellish situation for you but I'd agree with many of the comments here and log the incidents- you already have an official 'police record' from the story you told,and your friends information, so that's a good place to start. I was advised by police not to approach parents of 'feral children' (the 11 yr old going round on a trail bike) but to contact them on the new non emergency number 101 so perhaps that could be an avenue to go down. I'd definitely make it clear to him that you're going to record what he says to you. If you've got any kind of 'device' you can have in your hand while you say it, that might be enough to stop him without actually having to get a recorder. I'd also say it might be worth contacting social services. Can you ask other neighbours about him? They might have useful knowledge that could help you. If you're tenants rather than owners then the Landlord's a definite starting point.
Don't give up Zoomer. You have a right to enjoy your garden and have some peace and we're all here backing you too.
Zoomer really sorry for you. Do you have friends or someone who could be with youout in the garden next weekend so you also have a witness as to his abuse? Apart from that I would advise what everyone else has said. If it helps document it on here and print them off then at least you will have our support.
Hope you can soon sort out this horrible situation- big hug
I'm afraid I have to agree with the council about cutting back hedges hanging over pavements. Have you thought about babies in strollers. If parents are busy on their phones or chatting to friends then the poor child gets it in the face. It's amazing how quickly hedges grow.
Zoomed have you tried recording it, just a thought.
I love history. I wish I could spend a week in every 5 years of human existence. I'd love to be able to see the whole of the uk in William the conqueror was about. Can you imagine the wildlife
Zoomer you have my sympathy for what it's worth. Must be very unsettling.
I think from what you've said the neighbour does have mental health issues.
Social services will not discuss him with you even if he is on their books.
Sectioning under the Mental Health Act can only be done as a temporary measure if 2 G.P's agree that the person is a danger to themselves or others.
The council and the police will try not to get involved if the person is mentally ill.
In your position I would contact a mental health charity such as MIND, who can advise on best course of action and maybe ways around the problem..but do it as a concerned neighbour not as an upset one or you won't get help The neighbour might already be known to them and they can refer to appropriate services, you and I cannot.
If the neighbour has stopped banging on door after police intervention I would say it isn't a dementia issue, but maybe someone who hasn't been diagnosed or fails to take medication for other m h issues.
I'm not being a goody 2 shoes, just trying to help as this was my area of work for 20yrs.
Thanks for all the responses, it's very reasuring.
You've given me lots of idea's, recording is certainly a good plan and I'm happy to tell him what I'm doing. Will need to get a little recorder but thats not a problem. Think I'll also get a lock put on the garden gate too.
We are both owner's so no landlord invloved. Keeping a record of the incidents is a good idea and as I've no no immediate plans to move, complaining to the council and logging incidents with the police will at least give him the messaage I'm not prepared to accept his unreasonable behaviour.
Don't think it will be resolved overnight though but I'm at the point were I'll try anything so will save your responses. I'll goggle MIND too to get advise, I don't want to make him worse.
Over the years he has annoyed other neighbours, and doesn't like children, he would regularly chase away a group which played football outside our houses or take their ball if it went in his garden.
In the end it was more fun for the children to play knock a door run with him than to play football.
As long as you intend staying there for a long time Zoomer, then it's OK to go ahead with any complaint. I know that you have to disclose any disputes with neighbours these days if you go to sell.
I wish you luck and hope that you can get some peace, otherwise it's not much fun being in the garden is it. I hate it when I am forced indoors because of inconsiderate neighbours. Not a problem at the moment as it's too hot for me.
The disclosure bit has always put me off complaining, if I did move it would be for a bigger garden and smaller house.
One of the nicer things is he doesn't cause problems if there are visitors or during the week if I'm on holiday and at home becuase he never knows when I'm off work. I'm at home next week but got loads planned, some gardening days, friends calling and going out for the most part.
He's a crafty b.... isn't he. Only does it when no-one else around. Could use whatever it is these days and listen to music through headphones. Have asked son to sort that out for me so, when it is a bit cooler, I can work/sit in the garden without the constant chinese torture.
Have a good week.
Zoomer it does sound that the neighbour is calculating then, rather than 'unhinged' - for want of a better word. I'd certainly try recording him (or pretending to) and tell him calmly you're going to do that as you find his behaviour unacceptable and intolerable. It may be enough to scare him off. The fact that he stopped the noise when your friends spoke to the police etc shows that he realised you weren't going to be intimidated by him.
Good luck. Let us know how you get on.
Can't imagine nothing happening this week, will let you know how things go. I'm off to get a tape recorder.
Zoomer, there's me advising you to record the unwanted abuse but I hadn't thought of doing it myself with the dogs! Was too difficult to try to 'paper' record it. Good luck.
Zoomer, are you on your own? Some blokes get a kick out of doing this to women who live on their own, as they see them as an easy target (no partner to go around and 'sort them out').
Many years ago, when I lived as a student, myself and my then partner were renting a house in a lovely village, it wasn't a typical student rent (although my partner was working), we found out through the letting agent, that if the guy started bugging me, we HAD to report it to the police. The reason? The lass who owned the house had been insulted, propositioned, verbally abused and generally her life had been made unbearable by the boor next door. When her partner went around to 'remonstrate' with him, a fight had ensued and the neighbour who started it all went to the police to prosecute her boyfriend for the compensation he'd get. Unfortunately for him, they'd logged all of his provocative behaviour, and they were waiting for a court date, but had been advised to leave the house (hence renting it to ensure the mortgage was paid), until the issues had been setttled.
We got to know the outcome, the guy was a serial annoyer, he'd do it until a party snapped and beat him up, then he'd sue for compensation. Of course, there was a record of this, so when my landlord took him to court, and had the evidence of the other guy being a prat, and doing this on several occaisons, he didn't get away with it. He was given a restraining order (meaning HE had to move out when she moved back in), ordered to pay HER compensation, and given a suspended sentence, meaning if he did it to ANYONE in the next two years, it would be go straight to jail, do not pass go and do not collect £200.
So there is hope, just keep logging his behaviour, it might even be the same chap we're talking about, so be on your guard, and whatever you do, don't resort to violence, otherwise you might end up paying him for the pleasure of beating him up.
Apologies for the long post, but thought I'd let you know there are people who either make a living or can go on lovely long holidays by being a-holes and occaisionally being given a good hiding.
Tape recorders seem to be being phased out these days so can be difficult to find, however if you have an iPod or similar you can buy a small microphone to fit it and the quality of sound reproduction is very good. iPads have a microphone built in and a camera so you can record in video. A lot of modern digitalm cameras have a 'movie' setting which will record sound and video. A lot of mobile and smart phones also have the ability to record in video - so there are a lot of devices around these days that can do that job: you may not need to buy anything: just use what you have. John H
Thanks for that John. Did have a look but not techni minded. Will ask son about this when he gets home. He will sort me out.
Hi, MMP, sorry for not replying sooner.
I thought he maybe a serial nusiance and was doing this because I live on my own. Hadn't realised how long it's been going on but after looking to see if I've saved stuff on the computer found letters and responses to the council going back to 2006, that was when he started banging on the walls and shouting during the night. 2007 was when my friends stayed, I wrote to the council with a list of incidents and the police log number.
He had made the first complaint saying I was making an unreasonable amount of DIY noise - NOT. I agreed to noise monitoring equipment on the basis this was also put in the other neighbours home. He withdrew his complaint saying he'd moved his furniture and couldn't hear any more noise!
I suggested to the council they checked for complaints from his previous address and remember getting a call from the council several weeks later saying it was unlikely there would be any further complaints about noise from him.
I haven't retailated directly with him but gone through either the police or council but after last weekend am thinking of paying a pro gardener to cut back my side of his hedge of climbers which over hang about 2ft. The divide is about 10ft high now, this is the hieght he's at when pruning so you can imagine how intimidating it is.
I suspect cutting them back on my side will probably bring the whole lot down in his garden, getting a pro gardener to do it means I'll have a witness to say I was only doing what I'm legallly entitled to do and it's not a DIY job.
Wish me luck
I suspect that getting a pro gardener in will do the job, as most professionals will go around to the neighbours and clean up after themselves as well as clearing up any mess on your side of the fence. It's just awful that you're having to resort to paying someone else for something you enjoy doing!
If it were me, I would be going to a rescue centre and looking for a rather large GSD to rehome (but I love dogs, especially GSD's, but agree that if you don't want a dog, just getting one for protection isn't the way to go). A dog will give you love and companionship - curling up with one on the sofa on a cold night is great, and it will also protect you as the pack leader - the postie's just been, and Max has made his presence heard! They instinctively know if someone is threatening, and will come to your side, and bark and growl at whoever you're rowing with. It's in their interest, after all, you are their leader and provide them with food, shelter and love, so it's only logical they look after you.
But that's me and I wouldn't want to be without a dog, though if you're not at home during the day you'd need to pay someone to come round and walk the dog, so they don't suffer from boredom or loneliness, which often leads to behavioral problems.