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13/05/2014 at 15:49

It's not often that you laugh at a funeral - but we did today at the funeral of a dear friend.  He loved (and had been trained in) all things horticultural, and his allotment was an example of perfection.  That probably had something to do with his career in the army after the gardening training.

The hymn that had us all smiling (including the Rector) was a spin on All Things Bright and Beautiful.  I don't know where the words originated - but I've told OH that I want this at my demise!  Hope it brings smiles to many faces - and there may be someone out there who knows from whence it came.

All things bright and beautiful

All creatures great and small.

All things wise and wonderful

The Lord God made them all.

 

But what we never mention

Though gardeners know it's true

Is when he made the goodies,

He made the baddies too!

 

All things spray and swattable

Disasters great and small.

All things paraquatable

The Lord God made them all.

 

The fungus on the goosegogs,

The club root on the greens,

The slugs that eat the lettuce

And chew the aubergines!

 

All things spray and swattable . . .

 

The fly that gets the carrots,

The wasp that eats the plums,

how black gardener's outlook,

Though green may be his thumbs!

 

All things spray and swattable . . .

 

But still we gardeners labour

midst vegetables and flowers

And pray what hits our neighbours

Will somehow bypass ours.

 

All things bright and beautiful,

All creatures great and small.

All things wise ad wonderful

The Lord God made them all.

 

(Sorry about the double spacing - I can't seem to do it any other way)

btw the original hymn was penned in the nearby village of Dunster - so its inclusion today seems doubly apt.

 

13/05/2014 at 15:57

I have often climbed that hill in Dunster where that hymn came from,lovely place to be.

13/05/2014 at 16:05

Reminds me of the Monty Python take on this classic hymn;

All things dull and ugly,
All creatures short and squat,
All things rude and nasty,
The Lord God made the lot.
Each little snake that poisons,
Each little wasp that stings,
He made their brutish venom.
He made their horrid wings.
All things sick and cancerous,
All evil great and small,
All things foul and dangerous,
The Lord God made them all.
Each nasty little hornet,
Each beastly little squid--
Who made the spikey urchin?
Who made the sharks? He did!
All things scabbed and ulcerous,
All pox both great and small,
Putrid, foul and gangrenous,
The Lord God made them all.

13/05/2014 at 18:05

I came across a parody of Country Garden years ago. Not sure if I can remember all the words but I'll try...

Somehow the flowers never seem to grow in my English urban garden.
I’ll tell you some of the reasons that I know and those I miss I hope you’ll pardon.
Nettles in the flower beds, sparrow droppings on the shed stick to the walls and harden,
And ten thousand weeds are propagating seeds in my English urban garden.

I took a look at an illustrated book showing every garden creature,
But I’ve got a few so horrible to view the the author dare not feature -
Kamikaze bumble bees, anaconda centipedes, even a vampire robin.
I need a gun, not a spray, to keep the pests at bay in my English urban garden.

So it is plain that I can’t become a vegetable grower,
And I’ve decided what I will do and to hell with Percy Thrower.
Fill it up with broken bricks, get a load of ready mix, spread it and let it harden,
And then I’ll cultivate a concrete estate, not an English urban garden.

 

13/05/2014 at 18:30

 

 I spent a couple of years as a garden steward (volunteer ) at Dunster Castle.  The gardens, village and surrounds all so beautiful.

13/05/2014 at 19:28

I believe the poem / hymn was written by Barbara Robinson and the lyrics came to her whilst she was sitting looking out of the window at the garden. She says that she sang it for the first time at the Harvest Festival Supper at All Saints' Leamington Spa and lots of the congregation wanted copies to send to their friends. I believe Alan Titchmarsh used to use it as part of his show 'An evening with Alan Titchmarsh.'

13/05/2014 at 21:25

This is one of my favourite hymns/songs along with Morning Has Broken......I would like both played when I depart  This version is very funny though so may substitute the original for this one 

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