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Gardening Grandma

MMP, I will never forget the parent/child analogy. It is so illuminating and makes me realise the many times I have taken the part of the child, voluntarily, in order to placate. Never again!!

TT, I agree about the condescension. This is yet another occasion when someone will probably think hard before he starts another thread.

I think it is worthwhile to share our experience of different companies, good and bad, and have been thinking of starting such a thread myself. It gives a more balanced picture than the odd anecdote here and there and it keeps companies on their toes.


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        <a href="/members/val40/14512" class="forum-post__author">Val40</a>
        <p class="forum-post__date">05 Apr 2013 17:49</p>
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        <p>Verdun - the word

Yep. That's me. Getting sweets aren't I? Choc eclairs...they're simply the best......I'll get my coat

Just read through this-thought this was a forum where people were allowed to express opinions -now it just seems full of self-righteous people who think that they are in the right and don't ever question that self belief-if someone does- they get attacked

I find the phrase "get a life" really insulting and should never be used-no matter how angry you are

Thanks MMP for tryng to calm things down


I've taken mine



I am surprised at you Sotongeoff, I have had several problems with T&M too.

They are everywhere and in your face like TESCO, NOT because they are good BUT because they are driving small retailers to the wall as they have a lot of dosh. In the 80s' M&S and Sainsburys' did the same and look what happened to them.

As long as we keep buying from T&M, because they are 'cheap' they will carry on treating us badly. How dare they behave in this manner but are happy to take our money?

jatnikapyar why dont you just stir the pot there

Pennine Petal

What an interesting and lively conversation! I teach customer experience, there's someting called the service recovery paradox. If the company recovers the service failure very well, the customer can go away happier than they would have if nothing had gone wrong. I quite like that idea, whether it is true or not.

BTW, as customers we have to complain, because if we don't how will the company know that we are not happy. They won't always respond, then we vote with our feet.

Social networking sites like this one are making life very difficult for business, because we talk to one another and spread the news when companies upset us

Martin Lewis of suggests that you always complain to the managing director.


Joslow, don't ASUME that I haven't.

jatnikapyar stir away

Penenine petal some very sensible comments there.

Pennine Petal

Thanks Joslow, it's my pet subject.

Interestingly the majority of people don't complain, generally because they can't be bothered, because they don't think it's worth while or because they dobn't think they will get anywhere. I do complain, because I think it is imortant, but even I sometimes can't be bothered. There are some things we put up with, we have a zone of tolerance, others we stamp our feet about.

Sorry, the lecturer in me coming out. I find it such an interest subject. I teach my students to become customer experience guerillas

Woodgreen wonderboy

If capitals say you are shouting does this horrible small print mean I am whispering? CAN YOU HEAR ME MOTHER?

Nah, the horrible small print means someone's gonna need a yellow pages down their trousers for the ass-kicking they're going to get for not TESTING a software release properly.  I remember when I first started work, a chap that started a full year before me if he could upload an improved form into production because he'd run it through the test area.  When my boss had stopped laughing, she said NO, because there were another two stages of testing to go through.  He put it through both stages, then my boss gave it to me.  I broke it within five minutes.

Never underestimate the ingenuity of users to completely bu88er something up by entering something daft.

Later on in my career, I rang my boss up to ask what she wanted me to tackle after the weekend - as I had earmarked a full day to test a new report.  She later told me she'd had to go out & buy a new keyboard as I was the first contractor to schedule in ANY testing, let alone a full day's worth.  She'd sprayed the keyboard with coffee in her shock!

I'm guessing that someone fairly new and gung-ho has learnt a very valuable lesson in software testing.

It's very interesting to get the point of view of someone who is the complainee (as opposed to the complainer - if that's the right term).  I suppose that 'Paradox' is completely plausible - most people have to psyche themselves up to complain, and if the person they complain to agrees with them, and remedies the problem in a way where the person complaining has a great resolution, you can be left on a bit of a high with the adrenaline that's still running around your system.  Must be nice for the person complained to, to be able to change someone's experience from bad to good.  Whole area of interesting psychology here!

hollie hock

I don't work in retail but part of my job is customer service. As someone who hears a lot of moaning/complaining/false expectations/disappointments/sense of entitlement and poor service. It really does help when the person complaining remains calm and polite. I am only just a person, as are my colleagues  working in a company and do this so I can earn a living.

What I will say is the person who remains calm, reasonable and polite in any communicaton is much more likely to get a positive response from any organisation.

In the retail sector I guess if you don't get want you pay for and and are disappointed with their response, then just don't use them again. Not used T&M much apart from their "free" offers, was surprised at the size of the plantlets provided so have chosen not to use them again.

In terms of internet etiquette, the use of capital letters means a person is shouting, the same as it does in text messages etc.


Couldn't agree with you more Holly Hock.  Losing your rag and being rude gets you nowhere and why should it.  If I was on the receiving end of an irrational, rude customer, I too would dig my heels in and be unhelpful.  No one has the right to be offensive to others.

I know that it isn't ettiquette to use capitals, but I have often heard people who are unused to computers, etc, ask why they are getting capital letters.  They haven't got a clue how to turn it off! I can't text in capital letters as I don't know how to turn it on. Never been able to fathom it out.  So the only capitals are at the beginning of a sentence. Sad.



Yes, there is internet etiquette, which is fine for those of us in the know, but even in 2013 there are people who don't know the etiquette - we wouldn't be rude or ridicule people from different cultures, and on the same basis we won't jump on people who don't know.

It's saddened me when this has been done on here in the past - hopefully it'll not happen any more.  A gentle explanation is all that is needed 

But how do you learn about internet etiquette

Capital letters don't,hurt anyone.
Judge the CONTENT....oops! Shouting again? No, emphasising......of the message. If it otherwise is polite lets just read it that way.
Too many silly rules, nit,picking everywhere. Use black ink not blue...heaven forbid red or green ink
I don't shout but I do use,capitals sometimes. Some people need to use capitals for reasons of,poor,sight, dyslexia etc. I use my arms and hands when talking...does that mean I'm aggressive? Come on, realism and sense,is called for
Internet etiquette? This is a GARDEN forum plain n simple folks