Forgotten your password?
Register with us or sign in
What to do now
2 for 1 Gardens
Pots & containers
Grow & eat
My offers account
2-for-1 Gardens home
2-for-1 entry card
The Dirty End of the Stick
The potting shed
29/06/2014 at 00:16
Of course most will be able to substitute the, 'Dirty end' To a more explicit phrase. Back in 1964, Val and I moved into a council flat. To date. I still live here. We were at the time, the youngest married couple in the row. It was still the era, when neighbours were just that. To keep things to a minimum. Someone falls flat on their face in the street. Send for Mick or Val. An elderly couple a few doors away. The wife came banging on the front door. Mick, Mick, come quick. My chimney is on fire. Most strange. Because living next dor to her was a friend of ours, and he was a fireman. Anyway I trotted along. Got some salt luv. A drum of salt applied to the fire in the grate soon solved the problem. Advice. Get the chimney swept. Anothe neighbour, who bore the same surname as us. Bang, bang at the door. Quick Mick. I think the woman next door has done herself in. To this day. I don't know how attention was drawn to the event. In short. I broke in. The scrorny woman was laid onher bed, surrounded by a litter of young puppies. These tiny beasts had covered the room and bed with their excrement. I acted fast and managed to revive the woman. The the ambulance arrived and off she went. Time passed and no thank you. Then suddenly it was, action replay. So the same took place. In time the only responce fromthat lady was. Foul mouthing and total abuse. Still Val and I beleieved we had show true chritstian love and done our best. It must have been a couple of years later. Hammering and thumping at the front door. Our next door neighbour stood shaking. Mick you must come quick. Mrs Allen from along the road. Her old man has escaped from the mental hospital. He's after her with an axe. She was totally starkers. Never did I think that Val, my beloved wife might soon be a widow. I managed to get between the two. This guy really was off this planet. I managed to stall the situation until the police arrived. Thanks Val for dialing three nines. Ages went by and then verbal insults etc from the one, whose life I had saved on at least three occassions. Such is life.
1244 forum posts
29/06/2014 at 00:34
Chimney fires were all the rage when i was younger. There was never any need for the fire brigade. Then the gas fires and central heating came in and caused all the damp! and slugs in house, that is still a on going problem)
That reminds me. I had a central heating engineer round the other day and while he was working away he said, "I see you???re a darts man, like myself."
I asked how he worked that out and he replied, "That photo on the fireplace of you and Jocky Wilson.???
I replied, "That???s my partner mate."
(smile and a slap icon for that one. I think)
2893 forum posts
29/06/2014 at 06:14
Wow Mike, no wonder you have been fed up of late, there isnt enough going on for you, there isnt enough adreniline (sorry, cant spell) running around your system!
Edd, have you been at the moth trap wine again?
4467 forum posts
29/06/2014 at 08:25
Mike when I lived in the West Midlands I passed a house almost every day called LLAMEDOS. Thinking it was Welsh I always wondered what it meant,. One day as I was passing the owner was in the garden so I asked her.
"Read it backwards" she replied. Then went on to explain that they were always the couple everyone came to in times of trouble, but when they found themselves needing help, no one would lift a finger to help them.
S*d. em. all
519 forum posts
Terms and Conditions
Code of Conduct
Email me when a response is made?