Posted: 22/11/2014 at 13:38
Tradition says the tree and the decorations go up and the presents go under the tree on Christmas Eve, carols are sung on Christmas Eve, the presents get opened Christmas Day, the decorations all go away on 6 Jan and for the rest of the year it is not Christmas, I do not want to hear Christmas songs on the radio in November and I do not want 15% off the bird food company's Christmas range in August!
By 24 Dec I'm going to be so sick of it all I'll be looking forward to 7 Jan. I wonder what the public reaction would be if I went out shooting at the tacky ornaments that are still out after the Twelfth Day.
Family tradition is that at least one bottle of gin has been consumed by 10am, my uncle asks my father whether he's drinking that (125ml serving of) whisky or making love to it and my grandparents put as much food on the table as physically possible then insist on everyone having at least a little of everything, which means even if you're a 40lb sprat you're expected to eat at least some boiled potatoes, some roasted potatoes, some mashed potatoes, some chips, some carrot sticks, some grated carrot, some mashed carrot and swede, some boiled carrot, some boiled swede, some parnsips, some Brussels sprouts, some cauliflower, some broccoli, some stuffing, some white turkey meat, some dark turkey meat, some peas, some broad beans, some runner beans, some raw tomatoes, some cooked tomatoes, some roasted onion, some fried onion, some Christmas pudding, some brandy sauce, some Christmas cake, some trifle, some biscuits, some cheese, some chocolates, ...
It used to be presents for everyone. These days I may get Grandma a birthday present but everyone else can sod off. Everyone else except the birds. I feed them.