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Latest posts by fidgetbones


Posted: 04/08/2014 at 16:34

I dont care if I never speak to her again, actually.

I think that to deny a son  being at his own mothers funeral, because we were on an island in the middle of the indian ocean, with two flights a week(fully booked months in advance)is pathetic. She"couldn't hack it" having to wait two weeks for the funeral.

I dont intend leaving anything. I'm planning on spending it all first.

I've got no kids, and there's no pockets in shrouds. So long as there's enough for a funeral and a knees up, that'll do.


Posted: 04/08/2014 at 16:20

When mil died , she died  at 10 am, the funeral was arranged by 3pm, and at 5 sil wanted the details of what money there was. She was  told that she was being a bit previous and it could wait until after the funeral.

Time and a place and all that.


Posted: 04/08/2014 at 15:55

We've not had a holiday in 4 years. Not since sister in law said if mother in law died and we were ona remote island, with 2 flights a week,they would have the funeral without us.

So we've a lot of holiday time to make up.

My families a bit more friendly about that sort of thing.


Posted: 04/08/2014 at 13:53

There are three pixies on that site that look a lot like the bronzes done by David Goode. 

I have David Good bronzes in my  fantasy list for if I win the lottery.  The resin pixies are a lot nearer to what my pocket can afford.  The pixie lying on the flowers is so much a rip off of David Goodes   "comfort food " of one lying in a bed of marshmallows.




Posted: 04/08/2014 at 13:44

I've Pm'd you panda.


Posted: 04/08/2014 at 12:41

Sun is shining here. No work until wednesday , and I've booked a holiday

Just got to get my passport , insurance, jabs, antimalarials, diving medicals,etc.  As I was telling the aussie lodger, who doesn't plan for what he's doing later on today, Our holidays are planned like military operations.

North Sulawesi, here we come.....


Posted: 03/08/2014 at 21:26


Posted: 01/08/2014 at 22:57

The main problem is defining what portion of care is social care and what portion is nursing care. Sister in law had to fight the bean counters every step of the way, when they tried to scale back the care package. For instance, continence, asessed on a scale of 1 is fine, 10 is worst, the assessor tried to say that someone who is bed bound and doubly incontinent should be a 6. So how bad do you have to be for a 10? same with mobility. to my mind, someone bed bound, unable to sit up, needing to be regularly turned with a hoist, and moved around in a wheelchair would be a 10, not a 7. I have to say the team of carers were brilliant, feeding her, turning, cleaning, making sure she was hydrated, and she never had a bedsore in three years in bed.

It helped that her husband is a solicitor, and all queries were sent on his headed note paper.  When they said they would remove all care, we said we would pay for it all privately and then see them in court to argue the case. Every time they backed down. You couldn't do the arguing and all the caring, not enough hours in the day.


Posted: 01/08/2014 at 20:09

My mother in law was moved from the house in Coventry, into a smaller place next door to sister in Newcastle. She was always classed as being"in her own home".  Her daughter being next door neighbour was useful, because if they lived in the same house, it is assumed family can look after her. As it was, her daughter had a watching brief ,making sure the team of carers worked well, leaving her time to work, and argue with the social workers. The hallucinations are important, and I go through this with a lot of wives and husbands who feel guilty popping out for 10 minutes to pick up a few things. I see relatives being totally ground down by the 24/7 relentless caring.

Talking to someone who is not there is a hallucination.

Hallucinations means it is a mental health issue.

Therefore she needs nursing care, not social care.

Nursing care is free on the NHS.


Posted: 01/08/2014 at 19:30

I could archie, but having been at the sharp end for 30 years, it probably better go on the rant thread.

I could save the NHS billions, and divert it to real causes, but its very radical and not very PC, and it involves not being the World health service.

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1 to 15 of 34 threads