Posted: 16/10/2013 at 19:47
As others have already said Joyce, you can't control the situation so allowing it to get to you, as it clearly is, will not do your health any good, let alone the hedge.
You really do only seem to have limited options.
1) Allow your hedge to grow to the same height as your neighbours. You can at least then keep your side and much of the top tidy.
2)Keep you hedge at the level you want it and accept that your neighbour is absolutely within his/her rights to have their hedge at a different height and as scruffy as they want. You can trim back any of their hedge which encroaches on your garden but only that part.
I understand that you don't want a hedge stopping you looking out the window but you cannot force your neighbour to design their garden to suit your requirements.