Posted: 04/05/2013 at 13:44
I just hope they last a few years longer, I don't think I could cope with toddlers and Mum who has lots of health issues at the same time!!
Mum has also said that she wants to outlive my biological father, just so she can go and spit on his grave. Don't blame her for that at all, he is not a nice person (he did threaten to shove my teeth down the back of my throat when he thought I had stolen his wallet - I was four years old at the time). If anyone threatened to do that to either of my children, I think I would be up in court for Murder. Karma is well at work though, my eldest sister is just about the only one who bothers to visit him, and he has a full-time carer as he has demensia.
One of my best friends had a childhood that makes mine seem idyllic - her Dad left when she was 4 and her sister a baby, and her Mum was a Paranoid Schizophrenic. Social services were non-existent in those days, some days she'd have to sort out herself and her sister after a beating, her Dad would come around regularly and assault her Mum, and she'd have to sort out her Mum, too. When her sister started nursery, she was permanently catatonic - no-one picked this up. No one questioned why the two of them were covered in bruises, and regularly off when the bruises were too bad for one or the other to go into school. My friend left when she was 17, she got pregnant by her boyfriend at the time, they tried to force her to have an abortion, but being a good catholic girl, she refused, and instead was forced to marry the boyfriend (the marriage lasted 8 years, as the boyfriend inflicted the beatings she got from her Mum). She's now happy, the baby she had at 18 has been to university and has a good job with prospects, and Husband number 2 has immense respect and love for his wife (he's been told that if he pulls stunts like number 1 did he'll have a number of friends to answer to!!)
The upshot of all of this, is I understood where she was coming from when she found out her Mum was dying. She didn't go and see her, and breathed a massive sigh of relief when she finally passed away. When she went to sort out her flat, she found exercise books full of her Mum's rantings, what she was going to do to her two girls if she ever found them, what she was going to do to my friend's daugher etc. Most of it was burned in a big bonfire. She is an amazing person, and how she managed to emerge functioning as she did is not far short of a miracle. My daughter's second name is the same as my friend, as if my daughter is half as beautiful, happy and clever as my friend, she will be a lucky girl.
The more I see of what people will do to each other, the more I love my dog.