Start a new thread

81 to 100 of 234 replies


loving this thread.. giving me a good laugh -even though we shouldnt at others misfortunes, but can't seem to help myself

i was always told it is good to laugh and good to laugh at yourself too.. so have been doing it ever since.


Fun isn't it GF.

Kef, FG is right,  GG is on her hols again. Have caravan, will travel.  Need I say more. Hope her weather's better than ours. 

Wasn't me but the previous owner, honest.  I took down a large conifer which was shading the greenhouse and most of that side of the garden. When I got in to the bottom of the trunk I found lots of nice bits of stone, you know, the sort that people use to make small rockeries. Yes, another 60's dwarf conifer that was anything but!

gardenning granny

It's tipping it down outside - too wet even to run up top my leaky greenhouse!  Much enjoying these mishaps - having a good laugh, thanks.

Daftist thing I eveer did was to believe the seed packet that the five seeds of passionflower were precious and hard to grow.  All grew - were planted against the house wall - grew rampantly and covered the wall with wonderful flowers, followed by apricot-like fruits in the autumn.  The following year I noticed something pokling up above the skirting board on an internal wall indoors.  The plants were so rampant they had found a crack below soil level and were rampaging through the foundations. 

You feel very daft spraying weedkiller down the back of a skirting board.

The fruits dropped to the ground and I left them to rot where they fell.  Big mistake.Like poppies  a goodly crop come up each year and that's affter ten years.

Needless to say the plants had to be removed - and the damp-proof course investigated.....hmmm - not a happy hubby!



gardeningg- we shouldn't laugh but.....just shows you how careful you need to be doesn't it!

I suppose your conditions must have been just right for them! 


gardenning granny

Mmm.  dry, lifeless soil - who ever said passionflowers were delicate!

David Matthews2

I can relate to Steephill's comment re: 'overgrown' conifers - except I was the guilty party in foolishly planting several pot-nurtured conifers when moving to my present address over 23 years ago! At that time each conifer had genteel proportions and nestled in odd corner beds and alongside the walled edges of the terrace garden BUT they grew to become teenage 'thugs' and took over in earnest; shading out my greenhouse and the bulk of the garden vegetable plots. Fortunately my son holds a Chainsaw Certificate and was able to give up much of last October's halfterm break to fell the villainous rebels and release my garden from their combined shade!!

The transformation has been remarkable and all is now blooming in my new sun-drenched garden! 


As a very smarty pants 25yr old and newish to gardening I informed my neighbour, who wasn't as knowledable as me !!!!  That her new purchase was a Cotton Eater.  

I have the sort of soil Alan Tichmarsh would kill for , so even mild mannered plants go wild. 

I very much regret bringing an Hypericum ( I think) from my old garden. iIt's every where together with Japanese anenomies, and a couple of other plants whose names escape me at the moment. One has dark purple leaves and smallish yellow flowers the other had a mauve coloured flat flowerhead. both about 3 foot plus.  That's another problem I tend to grow dwarf vareities as they seem to end up much bigger than normal and the normal sized end up as giants.  Perhaps  I shouldn't  talk to them and give them encouragement.  What I would love to spread and have great difficulty in getting them to do so are Snowdrops  They just seem to sulk no matter where I put them, but my Lly of the Valley are going great guns even into the lawn.

gardenning granny

Yes, that hypericum self-seeds everywhere.  You just have to be strongwilled and pull them up as soon as you notice them.

My snowdrops are in a semi-shaded spot, along with Lucifer - trouble is the snowdrops want to spread to the back of the bed while Lucifer keeps edging forward intio the sun!  They are certainly not going to take my wishes into consideration - like the solomons seal which arrived with a raspberry bush - I've movesd it to several different more suitable positions, but no, it is determioned to stay where it first arrived!


Just checked the cucumbers in conservatory didn't need watering & then proceeded to test temperature of the water with my finger before filling the iron. Not got plants on the brain then.

Just been speaking to a friend and she did exactly the same with the strap on shoe things for the lawn, she is cleverer than me she got round the problem by just putting one on and then walking round the lawn. Mine are still in the shed.

The plot next to mine at the allotment has a forest of rhubarb, as usual did too much and fell over in to it. No one could see me as it was so tall. I still see myself trying to get up and slipping all over the place. I do tend to fall over a lot, doesnt help with my back problems. But im still smiling.

gardenning granny

oh Maud - couldn't help but laugh at the image of wellies poking out of the rhubarb leaves!  Hope you're back is OK though.

I now have a spinal fusion so when i fall over it doesnt go anywhere. Ive always been the one to fall over can even manage to do it getting out of a chair.

Maud talking of falling over, I have given up on baths.( I still shower I hasten to add )  The last time I had a bath after a day in the garden , lovely long soak, I couldn't get out of it. First time I have ever even had to think about it, I had to turn over onto hands & kness and lever myself up that way, so I symphasise with your floundering about in the rhubarb patch.  I slipped on wet path the other day and just managed to save myself otherwise I would have been head first into the roses.  


Oh yes ive done that in the bath as well. we now have a shower and as yet not fallen over.


Not quite a gardening story, was getting dressed one morning in hideous very synthetic elastic waist trousers to do some gardening, pulled them on and found I couldn't walk! OMG I thought, am I paralysed? Then realised I had put them on back to front.

Thought for a minute you were going to say you'd put both legs down one trouser.

Gardening Grandma

Sorry if you've already read this story - I did put it on another thread.

Daftest thing I ever did was to plant lavender along the garden path, under the washing line. It attracted lots of bees and hoverflies. I went out there one sunny day, wearing a full-skirted dress, to hang out some washing. The next thing I knew, my skirt was full of bees and I was  doing a can can around the garden, flapping my skirts in the air and uttering very unladylike shrieks! I now put lavender well away from the paths. Blow the lovely scent!!

Being a relatively new gardener and all puffed up with over confidence, I authoratively told both my mother and mother-in-law that the small, nettle-like plants in my raspberry patch were in fact baby raspberries - huff, don't they know anything?

I was still clinging onto the baby raspberry idea when they started stinging....cue a hasty weeding session and many blushes when questioned by the other half, although I've still not admitted anything to mother / mother-in-law!